Marriage is not just about staying together. Though easier at first, it requires an equal amount of effort and work from both the partners to make it successful. Being sensitive to each other’s needs, likings, thoughts, and habits and accepting these is as important as the decision to stay together.
However, at times, in an effort to accept the partner’s aspirations and habits, we do not come to know when we become indifferent. And mind you, being indifferent is very different from accepting. In such a situation, option for couple’s therapy can be a good way to acknowledge the difference and work towards continuing to building the life you promised each other.
So what is couple’s therapy all about?
Couple’s therapy entails seeking the help of a licensed marriage and family therapist to help identify the points of conflict in a marriage and resolving them to make the relationship more satisfactory and rewarding. The therapist guides the couple to understand their feelings, what is bothering them, voice their concerns and provides effective tools to help the couple. In fact, various studies have proved that in 97 percent of cases where a couple decided to seek help, they were satisfied with the guidance provided. Further, 93 percent couples accepted that couple’s therapy armed them with effective tools to manage their issues.
Are their different types of couple’s therapy?
Each couple is unique and therefore the approach to explore their relationship is customized to suit their needs. Nevertheless, therapist use and work around three primary types of therapies. These include Imago Relationship Therapy, Gottman Method and Emotionally Focused Therapy. You can ask your therapist about the therapy they plan to use and how they envisage it would help you. You could also ask for additional reading material if you want to know further.
What to expect in the sessions?
The most important point here is that both of you should be willing to invest in couple’s therapy. Most of the time, it is noticed than one spouse is more willing to attend therapy compared to the other spouse. If this is how you also feel as a couple about therapy, then ensure that you communicate this clearly to your spouse. Tell them that working towards making your marriage work is your primary focus. Talk to them and convince them to reach the counselor’s office with an open mind.
Typically, the first session is used by the therapist to know more about you as a couple, the relationship history, and conflicts, if any. They would use this information to understand the problem and customize your therapy plan. In extreme cases, the first session might also be used for conflict resolution.
In the coming sessions, the therapist would slowly work with you to draw you out, establish effective communication lines and resolve conflict. They would also equip you with tools to help you overcome minor problems on your own later when your therapy sessions are complete.
What if I don’t like the therapist?
No worries at all. It is not necessary that you gel with all the people you meet. Still, do not give up after only the first session. It takes time to build the trust and establish a rapport. However, even if after some sessions, you are not comfortable, then voice your concerns to the therapist. A good therapist would use the information to your benefit by making appropriate changes wherever relevant. If, even after that, you are uncomfortable with a therapist, go ahead and change them. It is ok.
If you somebody who wants to seek couple’s therapy, then please get in touch with the California Mental Health Help. We specialize in connecting you with suitable therapists near you. You can either call our 24/7 mental health treatment helpline 855 559 3923 and speak with an admission counsellor. You can also chat online with our trained medical expert for more advice.